I was afraid of the dark when I was younger. Terrified, to be exact, and to be more specific, I was afraid of being alone in the dark. The silent night was not my friend and the whispers that accompany the shadows always made my heart quake. So as you can deduce, I never slept alone with the lights off. I couldn’t understand my fear. I knew the dark void held nothing but me, I knew the sounds came from within, I knew there was nothing lurking, nothing near. But knowing facts did not stop the dread that held my chest, it did not hinder my lack of breath nor the incoherent thoughts that filled my mind. Knowing did nothing to stop the fear.
But then I found my saving grace in the familiar form of my mother’s wrapper. Her wrapper was a wide piece of ordinary cloth, usually tied around her waist. My mother’s wrapper was vibrant yellow and felt soft to the touch from many years of use. My mother’s wrapper was large and long, big enough to wrap around a skinny seven year old child. When spread on the bed, the wrapper’s colorful motifs seemed animated and I watched the story the design displayed.
My mother’s wrapper felt warm on my skin, a comforting heat, but more importantly my mother’s wrapper carried my mother’s scent. To a fearful child, the presence of my mother calmed my mind. No matter the worry, her hands holding me told me everything would just be fine. So when I could sense her by smell, a strong feeling of comfort and security filled my soul, as I felt she was near.
Armed with this new protective weapon, I approached my bed and switched off the light. Laying down with my mother’s wrapper tucked firmly by my side. I waited with eyes firmly shut for the terror that was to come. As the initial dread crept in, it was overshadowed by a stronger force. The calming breeze of my mother’s scent overtook me and changed my perception of time and place. No longer was I alone in a dark room, I was in my mother’s arms, pressed firmly against her soft skin. Her essence was all around me and I snuggled deeper into the cloth. Needless to say, it was a good night.
