She

After Thom Gunn

Fear intrudes, nesting in that she
approaches in stillness,
housed in quiescent dreams;
unresolved questions and a battle
against a passage; manic hate for it.
fear is a headless viper thrashing around in her;
this morning – a faint whisper and at night – a loose
floorboard when you step on it. Have I done well enough?

Fear is what makes it hurt
an imperceptible cord around the neck, a cloak of terrible terror.
fear wears you just the way you wear fear.

Damilola Oyedeji

Damilola Oyedeji (Ariella) is a Nigerian poet, essayist and educator. She is a creative writing candidate at Missouri State University graduate school and a past fellow of the Sprinng Writing Fellowship. Damilola’s story, ‘Nature’s Trick,’ was included in the ANTOA Writing Contest 2021 shortlist. Her poems have been/will be published in Synchronized Chaos Magazine, Spillwords, Prairie Home Magazine, University of North Florida Talon Review, Belfast Review, and elsewhere. Her creative nonfiction ‘Why I Write’ was published in the 2023 Sprinng Fellows Anthology.